Four Visits and a Funeral ...

Was to my first funeral in America this weekend. It was a service for the Serbian husband of a relative of C's. It was kind of different from what I'm used to. (And I've done a few funerals this year, believe me.) The service took place in a Serbian Orthodox church in Las Hambras on the outskirts of Los Angeles. It dragged a little, went on for about 90 minutes with lots of chanting, in serbo-croatian, and some odd verses in english. But the church was so compelling, so colorful and decorated. The incense however (and the heat, 'cause this was a hot day) gave me a headache. The burial itself took place in Orange County. Also serbian style. And long. I'm sure though that the man who passed away was both a very interesting and very intriguing person. I could tell that C. was immeasurably impressed by him. However, the things he told me about him couldn't but make my mind wander to the father's story in Big Fish (the Tim Burton movie from 2003). C's mom then told me something that confirmed my intuition. The stories that guy had told C each time as C was a child, those stories had been meant to impress. Funny how a woman's perspective on a (mortal) man is often so much different ...

We then were invited to the widow's house afterwards, for refreshments. Met a lot of family there. C's family, I mean. C's unusual serbo/danish relatives in the U.S. People drank a lot. I'm not exactly used to that at funerals. And they came across as extremely nationalistic. At least the serbian part of them.

The funeral took up the whole day of Saturday, driving included. Since we were up in Orange County, we got to spend the night a Jake's. He had a few of his and C's friends over. They weren't particularily lively when we arrived though. Crunched on the sofa with their beers and their baseball game on TV. And frankly didn't make much conversation, aside from some remarks on Paris Hilton's sex life and the good ol' beer kegs they used to have in college. They were also already sleeping by ten o'clock that night. Sort of exactly as I remembered them from last time, last year. I am told though that during the week they live very active lifes, all hot shot lawyers making tons of dough ...

The day before the funeral we had been up in Oceanside, to see C's sister G and her kids. Actually, all his sisters were gathered there, at a beachhouse they had rented for the week. We played with the kids half the day and went out for dinner on the harbour.

The day after, we drove from O.C. down to Temecula, where C's sister P had invited us for a barbecue. And again, "everybody" was there. Another good day of playing with the kids, doing minigolf, go-karts and bumber boats. Good fun for a family which really needed it. Still, everybody´s thoughts were probably with the one whose absence this weekend was overwhelming ...